(973): On a scale from 0 to 24…wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
via Text From Last Night (Amazing site.)

Of course, we all know I’m quite the runner. But I’m talking now of television marathons. I’ve been catching up on series. House M.D., Breaking Bad and Dexter to name a few. These were all amazing (especially the last) but solo experiments.

Then, Sunday, Girlfriend threw on the breathable jersey and nylon shorts to join me for Weeds. This, for the record, was at least semi-voluntary because she was ill. If you haven’t seen it, at least give it a shot.

It occurs to me that a newly widowed suburban mother of two selling pot on the sly fits into a strong theme. All the shows mentioned involve secret lives and two are about drug dealers. (Except for House. Which is awesome.) I won’t read into that further.

With experience under my metaphorical (because I often wear elastic-banded pants nowadays) belt I can lend some smarts to you, my dear readers. There’s a delicate science* to a television marathon.

• First: never leave without at least two episodes under your belt. (Or three, if you’re watching half-hour offerings.)
• Second: remember to drop all attempts at productivity before starting. (You’ll just be fooling yourself.)
• Third: all good television is better in marathon form. Be warned you’ll start to twitch during standard commercial breaks.
• Four: marathoning anything from ABC or CW will give you retina cancer. (Don’t ask me why, it just is.**)

* I don’t deal in science. Only the black arts.
** Yes, that includes Lost, freaks.