Archive for January, 2010

friday free for all

Friday, January 29th, 2010

… As of yesterday, I’ve been working as a contractor for seven weeks. By Monday afternoon, I will have moved into three different cubes; spent about fifty hours on-bus; worked past 8p twice, on three different computers and three sites; and haven’t been paid. (You read that correctly.)

After a particularly long (cou*12 hour*gh) day, I received a pitch about the many benefits and great things about signing up full-time. I was not impressed and, as my newfound stability isn’t all that stable, am still unimpressed. (I’m scheduled for a check on the 15th, as their accounting system defaults to a 60 day wait.)

… (Speaking of unimpressed.) The Apple i[Tab] (what an incredibly terrible name) was introduced Wednesday and will ship in two months. Some people will find a use for it but until I can justify paying for books instead of the library (on top of some UX choices), I’m out. My next Mac will be the Mini that runs my television after the move.

… Yesterday was my sister’s twenty-second birthday. We went to the restaurant she suggested and had a pretty great time. Afterward, Girlfriend, two friend and I went to a show. After a drink or two and waiting in line for about fifteen minutes, the power went out.

About a half-hour later someone told us they were getting information for refunds; thirty seconds after that the lights went back on. Roma di Luna‘s (if you’re not listening to them, you should be) set was cut short for time and we left before the headlining act. I’m fully exhausted today.

… and finally:
This is the first FFFA since a month and a half after I was unceremoniously and involuntarily removed from my former place of employment. Since has been a whirlwind. I very much enjoyed my summer but didn’t enjoy the finance-related stress.

I’m now actively looking for work in Chicago and if any of the threes of you dear readers know of anyone that could help, please let me know. I’d love to find a local job board or hear about some specific places looking to hire.

Thanks in advance. You’re all glorious beacons of light in this dark, dark world. Well, most of you.

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Posted in friday free for all, haha, media, random schtuff | 2 Comments »

victory

Thursday, January 28th, 2010

We used to sacrifice during war, falling heavily into debt that was sometimes recovered through growth or, not so long ago, pillaging the resources of conquered lands. Now we manufacture money so citizens can continue their glut, devaluing the currency, ballooning debt and sparking inflation.

Along with those internal struggles, a global economy means any country’s money is every other countries’ money. The interplay of loans, trade and–rarely–aid make any conflict difficult to resolve. War in the middle east cannot be won. Our nation is the largest consumer of their most lucrative export.

Each country, with no more land to forcefully take and increasingly limited resources is dependent on dozens of others. A conflict between nations is a conflict of interests. Increasingly, allies are more dependent on commodities than ideologies.

Many countries are caught in no-win relationships with their rivals. In fact, most are finding that cooperation benefits both parties more than antagonism. Those that don’t accept this are caught in endless turmoil, lofting explosives at each other between gunfire and gaining nothing.

In the past, victory was expensive but attainable. Weapons, men, supplies and mobility were found at high cost, financed or repaid with spoils and taxes. Technology now makes it possible to confront and debilitate an entire company for under a thousand US dollars.

Every “smart” missile that detonates one “terrorist cell” recruits any number of terrorists by fostering discontent and a thirst for retribution when their relatives are wounded or worse. Distinct cultures and terrain make overtaking an enemy difficult. Advances that give them the ability to kill with a cellular phone and readily available explosives make it more so.

Oil and other energy sources are costly and finite. The US Department of Defense’s per capita energy consumption is about ten times that of China, consuming as much energy as Nigeria. Three quarters is used by vehicles.

We have reached a point, through social and technological advances, where victory through war is impossible. This is a simple statement. This is a simple statement no one in power admits.

Even in Iraq I a multinational force only managed to defend a small country from invasion by another. In fifty years, no country has been taken by force. Iraq II has yet to be declared a war.

Misguided nationalism, strong support from powerful military suppliers and delusional misconceptions of power guide foreign policy. Until we accept that military victory is no longer an option, we will pathetically attempt to force countries into submission.

Our media can no longer vilify a miniscule, fringe element in order to create the illusion of an enemy population. Our politicians can no longer lead with guns. We must learn about and from other cultures.

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the hilarity of ‘powder’

Monday, January 25th, 2010

I finally sat down and watched Powder. The movie aside for a moment, I was astounded by how hilarious the premise is. (Bear in mind, the writer subsequently wrote two Jeepers Creepers movies.)

If you haven’t seen the movie and would like to, do not read on. I won’t waste time avoiding spoilers.

Jeremy “Powder” Reed is a higher-evolved being because his mother was hit by lightening with him in the womb. An expert in high-school level theory, Donald Ripley (Jeff Goldblum!), his science teacher, makes this assertion without hesitation. He should have hesitated.

There are ideas about what humans would be like if they used all of their entire brain instead of the ape-like ten percent or so (we use more, but not simultaneously). It’s not possible for many reasons but here’s one…

We adapted the ability to use tools and language to survive scarcity. We don’t have that. In fact, we have abundance and we’re still wasting it. Humans are dim, simplistic and lack foresight.

Natural selection, Intelligent Design, the Logos, God or however you define it made us this way. We aren’t supposed to realize we’re part of nature or that our planet is dying. We’re special in that we think we’re special.

So, for someone like Powder to exist, we’d only need a few periods of unparalleled scarcity, right? Nope.

It’s unlikely we’d ever advance past the point of ignorant, belligerent ape. Even with the rudimentary tools we’ve been given we dominate the planet. We idiots are the supreme species so there’s no need to adapt to anything more.

There can be improvement, sure. We can realize we can no longer wage war, address commonality in culture instead of differences and educate our children. Or even consider ourselves part of nature, acting accordingly.

You probably know from current events or Us Weekly, we do none of this. In fact, there’s a growing movement desperately against any of this. Which makes the ideas behind Powder all the more hilarious.

As a romantic comedy between teenager and cloud, it’s stellar. (See what I did there?) As a movie, it’s entertaining. As an idea, it’s horrid and absurd. Then again, it’s more likely than a winged beast that feeds every so often on somewhat-attractive teenagers or Justin Long.

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bowling at the jersey shore

Thursday, January 21st, 2010

I’ve never seen the show. I’ve never been to New Jersey. I haven’t used product in my hair (or, really, had hair) for nearly a decade. I’m not even sure I want to admit the show actually exists, but I will. Why?

In the last week, nearly five people I respect have brought it up to me on separate occasions. (For the sake of their eventual progeny, they will remain nameless.) Worse still, I spent a night of cosmic bowling next to an entire group of “fans” dressed to the nines as their favorite… um… character?

If you’re not aware of what I’m talking at, please back away. In fact, clear your browser cache. No. Turn off your computer and read five pages of a book. (People Magazine is not a book.)

For the rest, you’ll have to explain the draw of this show. I’m kidding. If you try, I’ll involuntarily lose a bit of respect for you. The jokes at its expense are somewhat entertaining but I have to make judgements on the comments I’ve heard and the theme-partied bowlers.

The comments ranged from: “so much of a train wreck it’s hysterical” to: “it’s SOOO ridiculous… it’s like a sociological experiment gone awry.” One (so called) friend even likened it to season one of “Real World.” (There is no. way. that’s. true.)

That’s enough for me never to watch but then I went bowling.

On a night where temperatures hovered around freezing, this group of bowlers was dressed to prevent heat stroke. The hair was big, the skirts were short and the quotes were plentiful. (“Funbags?” Really?) They were probably great people but they were wearing the wrong uniform.

For those reasons, no matter how fervently you argue the merit, I see nothing but harm coming from this show and its ilk. Taking the mold of bringing stereotypes (optimistically, archetypes) together and making a show of stereotypes within those stereotypes is not interesting. It’s boring. To boot, MTV already made the show in 2004, which is just lazy wrapped in a warm blanket of apathetic.

If this is the state of things, where people ignore reality and instead immerse themselves in “reality,” hope is in short supply. Granted, that’s if you still have hope. To each their own.

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Posted in media, wtf?? | 1 Comment »

the case for CoCo

Friday, January 15th, 2010

Inferred in the title, I’m a staunch Conan “People of Earth” O’Brien supporter. This does not mean I regularly watch his show. In fact, I rarely see it since I slimmed my subscriptions in Hulu but I watched regularly at first and enjoy his humorist tendencies.

That and his competition is sub-stellar.

David “Ahead of the News” Letterman is a better interview. His bits and monologue are tired but he, especially with guests he sees as inferior, is a master behind the desk (though, James “Your Favorite Curse” Lipton has him  beat hands down in overall style).

Jay “Have You Heard This?/Am I Right?” Leno has a tired monologue, uninteresting interview skills but can make fun of stupid people and typos. Jerry “Show About Nothing” Seinfeld is a genius in observing the comedy in the mondane. Leno’s genius is in trying to be Seinfeld.

Craig “Who’s That Guy?” Ferguson has filled the shoes of Craig “Where’s My Mirror” Kilborn well. Still, he’s a complete goof who I have only watched once or twice. He seems to have a following.

Jimmy “Stick Around After Grey’s” Kimmel has a stronger following than Ferguson and seems to have the staying power. At least on his network, which has ratings, I think, from televisions being left on after “Modern Family” or “Grey’s Anatomy” or, in some cases, “General Hospital“.

Because I’m such an impressive blogger*, I’ll even mention Wanda “Rock-Splitting Voice” Sykes and George “I’m Hispanic” Lopez. Neither are original (or funny) but both have shows (Fox Saturday and TBS during the week, respectively) because networks need to advertise pharmaceuticals to insomniac, depressed, middle-aged viewers. (Pills!!)

NBC’s decision to scrap their Tonight Show (a legacy of fifty-five years) for some hybrid option was rightfully opposed by O’Brien (his statement). After only a few months, O’Brien’s show had a younger audience, something coveted by most studio execs (lower proportion on a fixed income = more money = lucrative advertising). In any case, even Leno defended O’Brien’s ratings issues.

What no one’s talking about is how much Leno’s show sucked. I mean, it’s terrible. His monologue is just as abismal as it was an hour and a half later but the laid back format is boring, the interviews still terrible and his choice in up-and-coming comedians doesn’t fit his demographic. He can still make fun of stupid people but is that better than O’Brien?

No.

Mr O’Brien’s intellectually goofy style is more modern and more in-tune with the not-yet-middle-aged audience. It’s fresh and unique in a landscape of desks and couches. Jimmy “Look at My Gadget” Fallon has taken to the role of goofball after-The-Tonight-Show host, Jon “Say WHAAAAT!?” Stewart covers political humor and Stephen “Even I Don’t Take This Seriously” Colbert has a lock on mockery, so O’Brien can work his niche accordingly.

Playing one off the other here, as NBC is doing, provides a ratings boost and then built-in buzz for O’Brien’s next step. This, I’m behind. As long as he moves to a Hulu-friendly network… (who can stay up that late nowadays?)

* You may have noticed I didn’t even make a case for Conan’s staying at The Tonight Show or moving to another network or just retiring. I’m that good.

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avatar

Monday, January 4th, 2010

Being a cynical skeptic, I wanted to dislike this movie. I wanted the story to be trivial, the action to be a yawn fest and the much-heralded effects to be very 00s. Most of that ended up being true but I still liked it.

Before I go on, I’ll give you the short version (it’s been awhile since my last movie post and I’d hate to bore you). This makes Star Wars look like the pathetic, stolen from a million clichés, hack job it really is… purely because it’s the same thing with cooler toys (and stronger processors).

The story (like the aforementioned, poorly directed sextilogy) is stolen from a million anti-genocide, anti-war melodramas. It’s not spectacular. There are a lot of inane moments but it’s laced with enough allusions to our current reality to give it relevance. (Read: war propaganda, dehumanizing slurs, breaking from the natural order, “shock and awe,” etc.)

I was impressed with the action, which doesn’t happen often. Here’s where (full-disclosure) I’ll admit I saw it in IMAX 3D. This gives me a skewed perspective but I stick by the statement.

The scenery is stunning, the graphics are mystifying and the sequences of action are enthralling. I started to ignore the glaring redundancies of the story and got into the damn thing. It’s immersing. The effects are that good.

Really, it’s about the message. For that, it blows FernGully out of the water. The beauty of it (and probably why it’s so damn long) is you can take any number of themes from it. It’s anti-war, pro-Gaia, anti-corporatist, anti-fossil fuel, pro-loincloth and many others, depending on your mood, tax bracket or hair style.

For me, it’s about regaining our link to the natural world. Most of you know I think the free market’s perpetual growth is a joke no one’s allowed to laugh at, politicians are only able to reenforce misconceptions, our food is just as fake as anything on Pandora and we’re too far from natural selection to advance our species any further so my interpretation is probably a given.

Throughout the film, in varying contexts, the phrase “I see you” is used. Ultimately, this a call to see the world around us, the one we’ve been actively ignoring for more than a century (or millenium, depending on how you enjoy repetitious history) in the name of a small minority’s progress and an even smaller one’s profit.

The movie’s about a culture that exists within the cycles of nature coming up against a culture oblivious to them. It’s a fantasy not only in cinematic style, but because the former holds their ground against the latter. A quote near the end, “the aliens go back to their dying world” is haunting.

Superficially, it’s a fun show. It follows a predictable but fun-for-all-ages arch, has some neon blue nipple for the teenage boys, action for the dads, a simplified love story for the girls and a hint of feminine empowerment for those a bit older.

It doesn’t deserve all the hype but I enjoyed it a ton. It’s not a great movie but it’s one of the best this from last year.

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