Archive for November, 2008
wtf?!? 11.21.08 »
Friday, November 21st, 2008
what an ass...
After all the whining about how Christmas is being eroded, dismantled and violently attacked by domestic terrorists, where’s the “Christmas” in this post? (“Winter season,” eh?) Did you forget your one-man crusade? That you’re wasting airtime with your pathetic display offends me but you don’t even have the balls for consistency?
Maybe you’ve just realized the fight is lost. Christmas is a distorted holiday, bastardized into a retail circle-jerk. (If any of you watch Fox News, sorry for blowing your mind just there, should’a warned ya.) Does it matter what we call it?
Most Christmas celebrations occur between it and New Years; thus there are two (plural). Which, according to English-as-first-language, means “the holidays” is usually correct. Arguing that referring to them as such is anti-Christian makes you an ignorant dick but not using your own rhetorical idiocy? That’s just impressive.
It’s bad enough I already have to listen to shit Christmas music and watch terrible ads for extravagant gifts no one can afford. Now I have to watch (clips of; never made it through an entire “Factor” for health reasons) a desperate idiot talk to complete morons about an imagined war he can’t even live up to.
(More on the “controversy“)
(Incidentally, FoxNews.com—Factor especially—still looks absolutely terrible in compliant, modern browsers. Think it’s because their target audience is so smart and adept? Yeah… that’s probably it…)
Full disclosure: I despise almost all holidays (save New Years and Thanksgiving) and couldn’t care less what they’re labeled.
friday free for all »
Friday, November 21st, 2008
Only one today because (you’ll probably agree) it’s long in itself. That and I’m cold camping Saturday night and need to reserve energy so I don’t pull a Doogie Howser from “Snowbound.” (Tough reference but seriously, just knowing the low is twenty-four sent my balls AWOL.)
… Yesterday, after a tweet from @garrickvanburen I “typealyzed” my posts and tweets. Chasm is a “socializer,” which means (typos aside):
The social and opiniated [sic] type. They are especially attuned to the feelings of themselves and others. They tend to be very aware of the values of their peer-group and tend to see things as either right or wrong, good or bad. They tend to be traditional and value their friends and family the most.
The Socializers are down-to-earth, practical people and very keen on making sure everyone is alright. This quality makes them enjoy social work places. Since they enjoy beeing [sic] and keeping things neat and tidy, they often also enjoy working in such environments.
My tweets come up as a “mechanic:”
The independent and problem-solving type. They are especially attuned to the demands of the moment are masters of responding to challenges that arise spontaneously. They generelly [sic] prefer to think things out for themselves and often avoid inter-personal conflicts.
The Mechanics enjoy working together with other independent and highly skilled people and often like seek fun and action both in their work and personal life. They enjoy adventure and risk such as in driving race cars or working as policemen and firefighters.
I don’t know the algorithm that goes into something like this but I can agree with a few things: “social,” “attuned to the feelings of themselves,” “see things as… wrong,” “independent,” “masters,” and “working as… firefighters.”
Also, to prove (read: without proof) I don’t think much while writing (really should be obvious by now), here’s a graph (or something) of the parts of my brain that are active while typing to Chasm:
active parts of brain
guilty pleasure #4821: »
Thursday, November 20th, 2008
Thanks to Ben (@panchomill) I’m now quasi-addicted to something I should hate, despise or loathe. I’m not sure how it happened. Still, watch the video below and see if you aren’t attracted to the vacuous drivel:
You liked it didn’t you? It’s probably why anyone watched anything on VH1 since 2002 (save I Love [insert decade], which is awesome). The banter between Kristen, Jackie and Alisa is intoxicating in its emptiness. Plus, they’re social media sluts like myself.
Oh. And on that note… I’m now on Vimeo (videos to come, maybe). It works through Tumblr and it’s about time I had something outside of YouTube or the Book to load video into. (Talk about an impossible justification; I started sweating from the strain half through that sentence.)
close of a film, as metaphor »
Wednesday, November 19th, 2008
Remember Thelma & Louise? It was a crappy movie about middle aged women in a car on a road trip or something. Ladies, it’s where Mr. Pitt got his big break (took his shirt off). The rest (those that like watchable movies), he got his start in Kalifornia.
The auto industry is headed for a similar end* (though more entertaining). There are two sides to the coin. They could be bailed out (Louise). If they finally come up with a sustainable business model by March (unlikely), they’ll get more money from the tax payers. That on top of the two loans they’d already have.
Or they don’t (Thelma) and immediately file for bankruptcy. Doing so lawfully destroys labor contracts and sends a million or so folk into the street. Everyone lines up in bread lines and, globally, photographers stop using color snaps (because B&W so totally captures the moment).
I’m for Thelma driving. (Mostly, it strengthens my cinematic metaphor.) I’m all for cutting the fat. The companies made terrible decisions and have held back progress in industrial and environmental concerns. Also, I’m convinced I’ll never be paid for photographs unless I have some Depression-esque snaps in the portfolio.
If we let them fail (as they’ve been trying to do for decades) many will lose their jobs. In a real push for energy reform, millions of jobs will be created. Seems those assembly line folk could make wind turbines as easily as V8s for the latest shitty SUV.
Maybe I’m over simplifying but when faced with an inevitable film-exaggerated explosion upon landing, does it really matter who’s driving? (That some of you think that makes sense exemplifies why I’m not nationally famous… yet.)
* if you haven’t seen (because you enjoy quality film or just weren’t old enough) they ride off a cliff with Thelma behind the wheel. Watch your I Love the 90s for more.
fruitless »
Wednesday, November 19th, 2008
He sold his business in the restaurant industry to avoid stress. He’s not given information before arriving at the stop. However, he’s seen as the authority until someone else arrives. Dozens line up, confused.
They all see the bus, then the driver, and wonder why they’re unable to board. The wind is biting. They start to dance, warming their muscles against cold’s advances.
She complains, loudly, redundantly airing grievances to anyone nearby. There are small groups among the queue that talk amongst themselves. She bounces from one to the other with the same complaints, trying to spread her angst. (more…)