Thought Chasm

three and a half hours left

I’ve completely checked out. My projects enough of them are completed to an adequate level that they can wait until Tuesday. I’ve visualized my packed bag several times and figuratively penciled in a schedule for tonight so as to be most efficient. As they I don’t know if there’s an applicable ’they’ here say, here in body, not in mind.

To prove my point, here’s an email I sent to a few coworkers. It describes how to make a change to our current home page. I’ve altered some parts so you can better understand it before you ask, I did, in fact send this out; they likely think I’m an aluminum-foil cap away from being committed:

Keep for your records in order to reference if a situation comes up, or to wax nostalgic about our time together while I’m away on my long weekend.

In order to complete the task of swapping an old slide in the home page movie for a new one, you must complete an arduous six steps. They are difficult, and time consuming, but I have all the confidence of an ignorant teenager in you. You’ve shown yourselves quite adept in the [content management system we use] and, if you so choose, I’m sure you, whichever of you is deemed worthy, will have no troubles come Monday morn.

Read carefully, follow closely, and keep your hands and heads within the car at all times.

—Log in
—go to home page ([home page U.R.L.]*)
—click wrench at top of page in order to edit said page
—go to attributes tab
—change value of affected slide to new media asset using the dropdown (ex- slide3: use dropdown to replace [old slide] with [new slide])
—save page

Having completed these steps, in order (that is crucial, as you don’t have any choice), you’ll be able to view your fresh slide as it enters the rotation on the home page. Congratulations. Also, and this will be far more important upon completion of above task, it is considered uncouth to stomp, kick, or trip over those kneeling at your feet in order to kiss them. **

[MY EMAIL SIGNATURE]

*This was necessary only because the title of Captain Obvious is not handed out lightly. There are quotas.

** Can you tell I’m already mentally hitting (in this case with flailing appendages and softened skull) the slopes? Have a good weekend ladies.

This entry was posted on Thursday, January 17th, 2008 at 11:30 am and is filed under recap. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.