Archive for October, 2006
holy clusterfuck batman »
Thursday, October 26th, 2006
I just got off the phone with the fucker from dotronix again. what a fucking moron. no matter how many times i go through and let him know what i’ll need to do to make things work and what i can do to make things work he can’t fucking figure it out. it’s like talking to a fucking cocker spaniel in sentences and expecting him to have a clue what the fuck you’re telling him.
i don’t try to understand what the shit he’s doing. i don’t try to make things more complicated for him. i don’t overestimate how long it will take things because he frightens easily. i can run him around a conversation like hamster in a cage, but i don’t. i explain things as simple as i can make them. i break things down over and over and fucking over and over again so the shithead can follow me. instead he’s looking at a fucking duck in the pond or some shiny object or a coin flipped in the air.
it’s like explaining calculus to a three-year-old and really it’s not that fucking hard. he takes half of what i say and tries to make a coherant thought pattern out of it and then adjusts it in his head as to something he actually thought up and then vomits it out all over his desk.
all he has to do is take a second. breath into those old man longs. relax his overweight ass on his shitty office chair. focus on my lips moving and the sounds coming from them. take the words he knows combined with the words he thinks he knows and form sentences he understands. and look at the screens i show him with this new quasi-understanding so i don’t have to repeat myself thirty fucking times.
why the fuck am i getting calls from this asshole? on my own fucking personal cell phone. why is he making everything so g’damn complicated? why can’t he figure some of this shit out for himself and then hand me something that’s at least possible to create? why do i deal with this shit?
cause it’s possibly the easiest work i will ever come in contact with for almost twice what i get to move furniture with a quarter of the physical effort. and because i’m too fucking lazy and annoyed to find a different job.
that is all. fuck count: 13
driving eh? »
Thursday, October 26th, 2006
So i switched over my registration today. I’m officially a minnesota resident as the DMV is concerned. Have to admit i was stoked about the blue plates. They just look better on a silver car than the lameass red and green of the sconi plates. No offense of course. That also means that for at least a year i’m sticking around the cities. Don’t feel like going back and forth if i can avoid it. I am sort of afraid though.
To fill the time as i waited for the forms and such i asked the lovely perosonality behind the desk actually nicer than i was expecting when i should get my license transferred over. To my surprise she implied i either already should have or should do it immediately. I’d have to take the driver’s test and if i passed it would cost $21.50. I was saved by not having a passport or gift certificate.
How could they spring a driving test on me? on a wednesday no less. I would have failed. On the way back to the lakehouse i went through the list of all the defensive and aggressive driving strategies i’d picked up. Things like speeding up through yellow lights and on cloverleaf ramps, rolling stops, beating pedestrians at corners, and going at least 10 over on the freeway or 5 over in town. Plus i don’t even think i could keep a steady speed below 30 mph. How am i expected to unlearn them at the drop of a hat?
I only passed by 3 points the first time around when i was still paying attention. I’ll just ignore it until someone or some cop makes a big deal out of it. For now i’m off to put these swank new plates on coors.
debri from dilbert »
Tuesday, October 24th, 2006
The dad gave me some info on Dilbert’s writer Scott Adams. Apparently this guy has branched out from the office banter into something slightly different. The blog is funny and interesting. He seems fairly insightful. But he also has a novella that he couldn’t get published because of its a-Dilbert content.
Because of this he put it online. In doing so he created a demand for the hard copy and apparently made it a best-seller.
The concept may not be completely new, but his take on the ideas inside at least caught my interest and made me think about things. It’s titled God’s Debri and you can find a .pdf version here if you’d like to read. It’s short only about 130 pages and a quick read. It won’t likely change your life, but it’s worth taking a look.
asshole »
Tuesday, October 24th, 2006
on the way back to the lakehouse from New Brighton and the shitchasm that is Dotronix they can’t turn the heat up above sixty-five for some fucking reason i found myself in an encounter with the worst kind of shithead. not that he was doing anything wrong. in fact i was making things more difficult by slowing to let him pass me on my right. he was in his BMW and cautiously glancing back over his left to merge. i guess i wasn’t going slow enough because he did this numerous times.
i guess we’re so accustomed to having to cut people off or having the dicks come up on our left at speeds just fast enough to make the merge impossible that we don’t notice someone accomidating our lane-change. i wasn’t in a hurry and i was feeling generous. this doesn’t happen often not usually in a hurry, but rarely generous.
as a result of the rarity of this act i became more and more enraged as he refused to appreciate my gesture. i guess i’m just that much of an asshole that i need affirmation of any remotely-generous act. and now i just blogged about it. mmmmm… egotism. tastes like chicken just a touch overdone.
wings »
Sunday, October 22nd, 2006
5’6″. brunette. thin and fit. blue eyes. gorgeous smile. decent conversation. but really it’s the wings that made her interesting. I’ve recently become a fan of tattoos and the girls that wear them. It depends on the tatt and girl obviously, but something about them is intoxicating.
They (the wings) are between her shoulder blades. Red with a black outline and combined only about as big as my palm. My eyes were drawn to them immediately. Strange. I, fortunately, was assisted in starting a conversation and enjoyed it. Without the tatt though I don’t know if I would have had the interest as she was already borderline slunk. She was sexy, but without the wings there was no exclamation point. Her name’s Jessica by the way.
It got me thinking about my (soon to exist) tatt. I don’t have the bankroll yet and haven’t sketched anything or researched an artist, but the idea is solid in my head. It will be similar placement and similar colors, but much larger and obviously different. I’m just glad I won’t be wearing any low-backed halters and have weird chicks come over and tell me how sexy it is.
And a sidenote, open, question: why don’t the young sexy ones have the balls to come up to me and do the introductions? The trigenerians have that shit on lockdown.