sweet nectar of the obese
so alcohol and i have issues.. have for awhile, but while chillin at blarn watchin twelve mile band i was reminded how funny alcohol can be. the drinks get in some folk and they get stupid. i’m not going to pretend to have a clue what actually went on, but what follows is a series of events i saw go down last night:
guy dancing all over the floor (wearin a sweater for those who were there) gives some blonde a hug on his way back from the bathroom… she’s not impressed. skip ahead. he comes back around and appears to spill either on or on something owned by the dude this girl is with. i’ll help you picture this guy… blue t-shirt, about 200 – 250 lbs, maybe 6 ft tall… and not fat big, we’re talkin big big. the guy gets pissed and grabs his coat and moves over to the sidebar.
while this goes down blonde freaks out. grabs her purse, grabs her coat, and starts screaming something. she walks over to blue tshirt and starts yellin. i guess she wanted to leave and he had just bought a couple beers so he (logically) was chillin til they were cashed. maybe she thought for some reason he should take on sweater. either way tshirt seems to have taken the high road and walked away from it.
now… while blonde is still bitchin a bigger guy in blue stripes starts talkin to sweater cause i think he was a buddy of tshirt. sweater is about 5′ 9″, 150 lbs, and scrawny… this would be a fun matchup to watch if you like watchin elephants trample their trainers. too bad it didnt come to blows like i hoped. instead the green shirts came in and seperated stripes from sweater. sweater went back to sittin by the fireplace watchin the show and stripes went to chill w/ tshirt over at the sidebar til the beers were gone. blonde seemed to keep bitching for another 10 mins.
now picture this situation sans-booze. sweater wouldnt have been dancin around and probly wouldnt have kept wanderin over to blonde. the beer wouldnt have been there to spill and tshirt wouldnt have had to stick around until his beers were gone. blonde probly wouldn’t have been such a bitch and stripes wouldnt have felt the need to get in the mix.
i figure the situation would have been completely defused if there was a situation at all. thank you miller, budweiser, or in this case (because of $1.50 PBRs) pabst for all your help making my weekends entertaining. and thanks to twelve mile for providing a soundtrack.